The opening ceremony of the Beijing Olympics isn't the only big cultural event happening in the first week of August. It will also see the return of the hit comedy The Narcissist to Brisbane's Roundhouse Theatre. The Stephen Carelton play, directed by Ian Lawson, is also part of Sydney Theatre Company's 2008 season - an incredible coup for a Queensland play. Details here.

B105 breakfast funnyman Stav Davidson is burning the candle at both ends with a series of night-time standup comedy gigs in and around Brisbane. You can catch him at the Albion pub tonight (July 12) and on July 18 and 26, and on August 1, 15, 29 and 30; the Dockside comedy club at Kangaroo Point on July 25; the Springlake Tavern on August 21; the Stones Corner Hotel on September 4; and the Paddington Tavern from September 11-13.

There are few things more annoying to crusty regular theatregoers than a crying baby or naughty child in the auditorium. That's why cinemas have special "babes-in-arms" screenings. Now, the live smash Busting Out is doing the same at the Twelfth Night Theatre in Brisbane's Bowen Hills. If you're not a parent with a baby and you go along to the 11am show on August 27, you've only got yourself to blame if the noise of children annoys. Show details are here.

I suppose after the success of Puppetry of the Penis (which is going "legit" in its latest incarnation, playing at QPAC from June 17-21 as part of the In Stitches comedy festival), Busting Out just had to happen. The show, which plays at the Twelfth Night Theatre in Brisbane from June 11, features Emma Powell and Bev Killick taking a "most irreverent look at that much revered embodiment of womanhood – the breast". I'm sure you get the picture.

Temptation champ, comic, all-round entertainer and Richard III enthusiast Blair Martin will again be hosting Cab-Savvy, a fund-raising night of trivia and entertainment at the StageDoor Dinner Theatre in Brisbane's Bowen Hills on June 30. It will be the closing event of the Brisbane Pride Festival 2008, and a good time is guaranteed while you're raising funds for HIV/AIDS charities. You can book by email or on 33683948.

Bad spelling aside, what's not to like about The Mutha of All Divas? It stars Brisbane cabaret favourite Carita Farrer, it's at the QPAC Playhouse Studio 2 from June 18-28 and it's about ... er. Well, the blurb Farrer has sent me says this:

Watch in simultaneous horror and delight as this Mutha of all Divas struts her stuff. She's got her jazz, she's got her pop, she's got her contemporary, she's got her opera, and she HAS LOST THE PLOT. Songs with dogs, duets with herself and show-stoppers sung in the nuddy like a drunken sailor. The Mutha Diva is the ultimate showbiz all rounder ...AND... the worst performer to have ever graced the stage

So, it's all clear. Bookings here.

Madonna, whose career as a movie actress has hardly been stellar, reportedly wants to remake Casablanca and set it in Iraq. I have two words for her: Please, don't.

In 1980, on Monty Python's Contractural Obligations album, Terry Jones sang, "I'm so worried about the baggage retrieval system they've got at Heathrow". Fast forward to this week, and Heathrow's new terminal five is suffering problems with its baggage system. Spooky, eh?

When satirist Eddie Perfect revealed that he was working on a musical about cricketer Shane Warne, I thought he might be joking. He wasn't. The latest, including a picture of Perfect as Warne, is here.